Over the weekend we overheard a woman say, “We’re each other’s #fitspo.”
There’s not enough time to possibly unpack that statement or what has happened to the world that brought us to this dark place, but it DID help inspire our next One-Liner Challenge: CRUSTY OLD GYMS.
As in the standard, classic, OG gyms of yore—like, Gold’s Gym, Planet Fitness, Powerhouse, and every local gym with rows of dusty ellipticals. Mildly-fun fact: We actually work out at one of these gyms and we LOVE it. For everything it, isn’t.
The question, of course, is: in the land of soul cycling, pure barring, and orange theory-ing, how can a regular ‘ol gym even compete? So we gave ourselves an hour and brainstormed some funny one-liners that they could use to appeal to people fatigued by the boutique, over-hyped, pricey gyms that have taken over.
The rules, as a refresher:
- 1 brand or product
- A firestorm of one-liner campaign concepts
- Humor + fun = weapons of choice (duh)
- All concocted in under one hour
- Based solely off of the brief benefits they list on their home page or packaging. (Hell, we only have an hour, ok?? THERE’S NO TIME FOR A LARGER STRATEGY THAN THAT.)
- Play fast and loose
- Do your best
- Trying and bombing is better than never trying at all
- All’s fair in a creative ideation dump
- Champions never cry
The 18 that made the cut. (RIP the 50+ we didn’t let in the party.)
- Fitness that won’t cost you your firstborn.
- You say “Just a gym,” like it’s a bad thing.
- Sweat for the self-love, not the likes.
- Where your sleeveless, sideless muscle tank is always in fashion.
- Cut out the middleman (and the grippy socks).
- Lift heavy things, don’t pay heavy prices.
- A gym that will make over your body not take over your conversations.
- Some people need black lights, intense music, and preachy instructors to get in shape. Not you.
- No false hype was harmed in the making of this fitness center.
- Hours as flexible as you’re about to become.
- Full service, not over-filled classes.
- The gym for self-starters.
- More muscle, less hassle.
- Throw your weight around.
- Be a gym rat without the gym rat race.
- A gym where people just workout? Now, that’s a novel idea.
- Around here we pump iron, not your ego.
- Gym mirror selfies included free with membership.